Mainstream Malayalam cinema is telling queer stories, largely honestly, but seldom through the queer gaze. While some in the community find some of these efforts, mostly through ‘straight lens’, as doing a disservice to it and, unwittingly, promoting homophobia, Jijo Kuriakose, a writer, artist/photographer and now filmmaker, is appreciative of the efforts at mainstreaming the queer experience.
“I have been watching mainstream films [on homosexuality] like Kaathal: The Core but the queer gaze is missing. We should speak about/ for ourselves,” says Jijo. He appreciates the film and does not see it as queer-phobic. Some people from the LGBTQI community saw it thus because, for instance, of how Mamootty’s character was forced to come out. When such movies get made in the mainstream, it sets off discussions, which Jijo feels are important.
Velipadu (Revelation), his 25-minute short film, pans in on the experience of being gay in a local context. While there are plenty of international ‘gay instances’, few are relatable to someone accepting their identity. The film pivots on a deacon, Johnny, who is conflicted by his sexual identity and shows how he negotiates his way in the only way possible — accepting himself. He is in love with a man, but societal and religious pressures make it difficult to come to terms with it. He is engaged to be married to a woman.
The choice of protagonist was organic. “The story had to be told through somebody, and that person happened to be a student of theology at a seminary. The story is a mix of experiences—of my coming out story, of people who are still closeted. It will resonate with those in a similar situation.”
Facets of faith
While Jijo juxtaposes faith and sexuality at opposing ends of the spectrum, he questions why both have to be mutually exclusive. He is referring to Christian denominations that permit marriage. Jijo uses Christian images, such as the Last Supper, to communicate Johnny’s feelings of confusion and, perhaps, letting himself down by not being brave enough to stand up for himself.
Jijo evocatively communicates Johnny’s conflict; after all, coming out in a largely homophobic society and living with the decision is hard. He also raises questions about polyamory throughout the movie, as it ends on a note that suggests it.
“Kaathal The Core initiated a discussion, as did Moothon. It is important that such stories are told. There should be a representation of queer identities, there should be more such stories in the mainstream!” Velipadu is Jijo’s way of contributing to the narrative; “I asked myself what I could do. I wanted to share my lived experience.” He hopes to take the film to festivals and, if possible, screen it in educational institutions, which he understands will not be an easy task.
Making the film was a challenge, which made him wonder if he would be able to make the movie as it was his first time in the medium. He had earlier made a documentary Njan Sanjo, on the experiences of a transman, Sanjo Steve. Velipadu has three songs, all written by Jijo.
The film ends on a positive note, with Johnny telling his fiancee Jisha that he cannot marry her and more importantly, Johnny accepting himself and living his truth.